In regards to writing this post, that is. I think my procrastination is entirely due to the fact that I have been afraid to write this post and working up the nerve to post it. I have mentioned that my weight has been going up recently and it has been a constant source of frustration for me. According to MyFitnessPal after my latest weigh-in, I've lost 37 lbs., which is nothing to sneeze at. However, at one point, I was down nearly 60 lbs., so it is a little discouraging to see where I am now. It is entirely due to my lack of working out and poor eating habits, so I just need to get back on track and I feel like I'm headed in the right direction, but more on that soon.
As part of my process of getting on track, I have decided to not focus on the scale at all. With the exception of my monthly weigh-in at the gym, I am not going to weigh myself and am instead going to focus on getting stronger, healthier, and eating better. I have been a slave to the scale for far too long and it is so demoralizing and draining. My weight fluctuates so much on a daily basis and it is way too easy to get discouraged by those fluctuations. Am I frustrated by my weight gain? Hell yes. Am I going to continue to let it bring me down, essentially letting it define me? Absolutely not. I am more than a number on a scale; we all are. My weight does not define me. It does not dictate my ability to be a good wife, mother, daughter, or friend. It was hard as hell to write this post, but I started this blog to hold myself accountable and to share my journey, including the good, the bad, and the ugly.
I went to the gym last Saturday for my consultation with one of the trainers and as part of the session, I weighed in and had my measurements taken. I talked for awhile with the trainer about my unhealthy habit of weighing myself so frequently and it was good to talk through those issues. I was surprised to find that my weight at the gym was quite a bit less than my scale at home. When I weighed in at home last Saturday, the scale said 249.2 and the scale at the gym said 236.5. I don't think I have to tell you which number I preferred. I asked the trainer about the discrepancy and he was just as perplexed as I was.
I am proud to say that I have not weighed myself since the weigh in at the gym last Saturday, which is a huge accomplishment for me. I will not be weighing in again until my next assessment at the gym on August 30th. Instead, I have been working out regularly and trying to eat better (still a work in progress if I'm being honest).
After my session at the gym last Saturday morning, I rode the recumbent bike for an hour and watched a few episodes of Extreme Couponing on TLC. Much as I like to think that I could ride the bike all day, towards the end, my tush was a little irritated with me. Monday night I did 35 minutes on the elliptical and Thursday night I did 35 minutes on the recumbent bike. I'm enjoying the gym and particularly, a little bit of time to catch up on some shows on TLC and HGTV!
When we received our Napa swag a few weeks ago, my teammates and I had a great discussion about body image and it just re-confirmed my love for these women. I think I may have been the first one to make a comment about needing to work on my planks and crunches to eliminate the "muffin top" I had going on when I tried on our team t-shirt, but I was soon reminded of the fact that we all come in different shapes and sizes and we are all badass, beautiful strong women! I know I've said it before, but I'll say it again (and probably many more times), I am very thankful to be a part of such a great group of women. The support and encouragement that they provide is invaluable!
I'll end tonight with my teammate Melissa's comment from that discussion about body image a few weeks ago because she was spot on and I find myself repeating her wise words on a regular basis. Thank you, Melissa!!
"Scales have a number. Same with your shoe size. Also your age. Your phone number. A bunch of numbers. That's all they are. They are NOT WHO you are. You are a BAMR."
No comments:
Post a Comment